My experience with bullies on and offline

Okay, so most of us may or may not had to deal with a cyber bully at some point, either on here or somewhere else on the internet. But I've had my taste of it a few times and I gotta tell ya, it's annoying as fuck. Here is the latest instance I've had with cyber bullies...

A few weeks ago now I was having a polite debate with someone, and we were discussing a topic with facts and some opinions on the matter. Now we both were being cordial and though we may not have agreed with each other we were still respectful. Then out of nowhere someone who was not a part of the conversation came bursting in and shouting about how wrong I was. Now when I defended myself using facts I had already said in previous comments they seemed to have lost their steam so instead went to insulting me. The actual phrase was "Well you're just some stupid, fat, ugly, cow and you should keep your opinions to yourself!"

Now my initial reactions was "Dafuq? WHO ARE YOU?!" Now most would just block the idiot and move on, but I was now mad and looking to fight so I let my fathers lovely sarcasm come out to play. I replied to this like so: "Um excuse me? Do I know you? Cuz I'm pretty sure you don't know me. First of all, bitch please, if you want to insult me you are gonna have to try harder because I say worse shit than that to myself everyday. Second I am well aware of my body and what it looks like, I do own a mirror. I'm not going to have a sudden revelation on my appearance just because you said that, like "NO REALLY? I had no idea!" and third, grow up."

I didn't hear from the idiot again but they were just one in a long line of successors. I have been bullied most of my life so by now I have a pretty tough skin, but the gall some of these strangers have is just astonishing. I spent most of my school years in a hormonal depression, and while I may have acted tough and acted like it didn't bother me it did. Years of taunts and gibes and I had more than a few tell me to just kill myself. Here's the thing... I tried once. I came home after a bad day and stared at a bottle of meds for two hours crying and debating on if I should just swallow it and be done. When my dad came home early I put the bottle away and pretended everything was fine. The next day I told someone and I was brought in for counseling, it didn't really help at first but I learned I wasn't alone and got some better support. After that I started snapping back at people and they began to leave me alone, well that and I punched a guy twice my size who was giving me grief. He dropped like a rock and I made it very clear that if he kept it up he was going to find out what torture really felt like. 

If anyone else has felt this way please know you are not alone, this journal is for the ones who couldn't take it anymore and did end it, the ones who were left screaming silently for help and never got it, for the ones who did and became stronger, for the survivors. We are better than our abusers and we can fight back, we sometimes just need to find our voice.